Sarah Rudek, MA, LPC, a therapist at North Shore Family Services with offices in Northbrook, Skokie, Park Ridge, and Libertyville, was interviewed by Jackie Pilossoph of the Chicago Tribune to provide guidance to “Solo Moms” on how to handle situations where the other parent doesn’t show up for visitations. The article provides both practical and specific tips to help their children through the disappointment as well as helping the parent understand what they can and can’t control in the situation. Read more here.
Middle School Success:
If you could go back to middle school, would you? Most adults wouldn’t! Think about it: challenging peer groups, different teachers and classmates at least 8 times a day, figuring out what each teacher expects from you and how to act around various peers of varying degrees of social status? No wonder middle schoolers sleep until noon on the weekends. It’s exhausting!
Despite all of the overwhelming factors, middle school can also be an exciting time. Not only do middle schoolers learn new independent skills, but they are also given more responsibility. Teachers’ expectations are higher, peer situations are evolving, and school work is escalating. We want to ensure that our kids are prepared to head into middle school with confidence and realistic expectations for the upcoming school year. Here are a few tips to help your child make the transition to middle school a positive and successful experience.
Organization and Executive Functioning Skills
- Buy an assignment notebook and write down the assignments before leaving each class (Don’t wait until the end of the day)
- Use colorful binders that coordinate with notebooks (One for each subject)
- Find a place in your home for homework each night (Keep things in the same place)
- Prioritize homework assignments for that night (Don’t skip instructions)
- Time Management (Make sure you have enough time to do your homework before and after school activities, relaxation time, dinner, and bedtime)
- Put papers away after finishing them (where they are supposed to go)
- After completing assignments, put folders and notebooks back in backpack right away (Don’t wait ’til later)
Asking for Help (Self-advocating)
- Talk with your teacher if you don’t understand something (Teachers are more willing to help you with homework when you ask them questions instead of skipping the assignment)
- Use I-statements when asking questions (e.g. I feel confused because I don’t understand the homework instead of- You didn’t explain it).
- If you are worried about asking a teacher in person, write a note or email your question or concern to your teacher
Peer Interactions (How to Make and Keep Friends)
- Keep inviting peers to engage in activities (not excluding others)
- Showing positivity towards others
- Respecting everyone’s personal space and understanding boundaries
- Listening to what that person is saying without being distracted
- Stop and think before acting or saying something
- Show empathy towards peers
- Don’t post information on social media that is disrespectful to peers
- Don’t gossip, start drama, or bully kids
Remember, middle school doesn’t have to be as scary as it may seem. Use these preventive strategies to start your journey on a positive note!
Top 3 Reasons to Keep You Motivated for Summer Weather
by Sarah Rudek, MA, LPC
So, you are finally ready to start to get your summer body ready. “I’m going to the gym and eating healthy!” The question that everyone thinks about is How Do I Stay Motivated? Research has shown that there is a correlation between a healthy lifestyle and mental health. Below are the top 3 reasons to stick with your health goals for summer.
1. Stress Reduction-Stress is part of our daily life. There are both positive and negative components to stress. Positive stress keeps us motivated to work towards a good outcome. Negative stress causes us distress and leads to a bad outcome. When we are working towards a healthy goal, we want to increase positive stress and stay motivated. Yes, we may think that an hour of exercise each day could cause us negative stress, but in reality, it is good stress. Exercises such as running, swimming, and cycling can push us into the positive stress category and therefore reducing negative stress.
2. Gaining Mindfulness– Mindfulness is a coping skill that several professionals will use as a technique to reduce anxious symptoms. There are three states of the mind: the reasonable mind, wise mind, and emotional mind. Mindfulness will help lead us into our wise mind, also known as the balanced mind. In order to achieve mindfulness, you need to be fully focused on the present moment without trying to process it. Exercises such as yoga, pilates, or cycling will give you the opportunity to be fully present in this state of mind.
3. Achieving Holism within your Body– Our bodies are interconnected. How we sleep, eat, and exercise can significantly affect our mental health. Sleep allows our minds to process what has happened that day and recharge for the following day. Eating healthy gives our bodies positive energy to move forward and conquer various tasks throughout the day. Exercise provides our bodies with mindfulness, stress reduction, positive energy, and overall positive health. Connecting these three areas of our body is important to provide ourselves with a successful outcome.
Remember, you can do it!
The motivation will allow you to get through all the negative thinking. Continue to challenge your negative self-talk and keep in mind the reason you started.